I just got to help out at Nickelodeon’s exclusive (cast/crew) Korra premiere party. OMG I’m still nerding out inside. best. night. ever. 

I met and talked to the president of Nickelodeon today - asked her what nick’s philosophy on gender, race, and overall diversity is and how that effects show decisions. 

http://goodwomenproject.com/from-the-men/what-decides-how-much-a-woman-is-worth

This article makes me so angry and frustrated, because I hear similar things too often. I should be writing my 18pg paper right now but the emotions are bursting forth with too much strength…fear. fear that so many read this article, or hear similar words, and think they are good and encouraging and wonderfully breaking the walls of women’s self-esteem issues, hoorah. 

No.

It’s victim-blaming. 

It’s man feeling like the sentimentalist do-gooder, Educator, here let me pinpoint the source of your problem:

IT’S ALL YOU! It’s all YOUR responsibility to see that you’re actually a person of worth and stop putting your worth in the wrong places. JUST STOP. 

exact quote:

“Here’s where the problem lies; you search for and attempt to find your value in so many other places than it’s true source….So please, let the Truth scream louder than the lies.”

aka. “So please, try harder.” 

And so I am left with shame. My fault. My bad. I shouldn’t place my worth in the wrong places, duh. Should have known better, thanks for educating me.

But what about the paradigms I’m forced to live with EVERY DAY simply because I was born female in a society that objectifies the female body? A society that tells me I’m worth less in ways it does not tell you because you’re privileged, you have the power, male gaze! What about the ways that you (MEN, and women) contribute to and partake in this culture which continually marginalizes me, oppresses me, makes me a less-than, just a body, a non-equal? In what ways do your words and actions imitate Jesus, who would walk alongside me in my struggles and put himself into my shoes, into my place? Can you imagine what it would be like to be me in a world that objectifies my body? What have you done to FIGHT it alongside me? Can you claim equal responsibility in this battle against a MUCH LARGER PARADIGM than simply a roadblock located in my head? THE FORCES OF OBJECTIFICATION AND OPPRESSION are so much larger than myself, they are beyond me, they are in the dark, sinful parts of your heart, and mine, and they are in the culture and society we live in. To battle it is SO MUCH HARDER than telling me to just TRY HARDER (because that marginalizes me even more damn it). This is just as bad as that article “If I were a black kid…” in which he blames race-related educational inequality/poverty on the black kids for not trying harder, for having roadblocks in their heads, just get over it and you’ll succeed, while missing the larger picture about how we all contribute to that paradigm.

I know you mean well. I thank you for your good intentions, but I am hurt by the way your words exempts men/yourself from responsibility and puts the entire burden of fighting a great evil on me. Your proposed solution of fixing me, fixing my mentality, doesn’t change the fact that I’d still have to live as a woman in an unjust society.

On the practical side, how about instead of playing the paternalistic role of Educator, why not start a dialogue by asking women what causes them to feel worthless? Why not, instead of telling women to just stop feeling that way, actually fight the negative aspects of our culture by speaking out and affecting change? Why not read up on literature on the gender dynamics caused by male privilege, and re-articulate your thoughts about female healing afterward? Please don’t educate me about what it means to be a woman until you have truly tried to see the world from my perspective first, and then I welcome you to walk alongside me as an equal.  

(P.S. I do agree that ultimately, this is all in God’s hands - the healing, the justice, the sense of worth. I appreciated that point in your article, I just qualify it by adding that we all have a role to play if we pursue God’s heart for justice.)

Only 1 in 40,000 women actually meet the requirements of a model’s size and shape (Wolf, 1991).

damnnnn.

I’m art blogging again! http://justinasjots.blogspot.com/ Being surrounded by amazing talent at Nickelodeon has definitely inspired me to pick up art and try to get better.

I dreamed that there was a paper due in class and I had forgotten so everyone was turning it in but me. Also I suddenly realized I hadn’t been attending a class I was registered for, and had to panic to scramble to catch up, or fail out. So I tried to find the dean to un-enroll for the class, but the dean was too busy to see me, and also it was way past drop-add, too late… 

WHY AM I STILL HAVING NERD NIGHTMARES?! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! need. school. to be. over. #senioritis